I am on the road quite a bit. The commute from my home in Fort Mill, SC to my place of work in Huntersville, NC averages out to be an hour’s drive each way. And though it can be long and tedious, I try to observe and learn from all that happens around me. It’s incredible how parallel lessons from the road and lessons from life can be. They also intersect.
About a month ago, I exited off I-77 in Charlotte to grab some lunch. My vehicle was positioned in the left lane of two lanes heading straight. As we approached a red light, we gained a left-hand turning lane. When the left-hand turning lane was granted a green arrow, those vehicles began to move. The one vehicle ahead of me in the straight lane, sensing forward motion from those to its left, proceeded on as well. One problem: our light had remained red.
Instantly, I noticed a gentleman on the opposite side of the road. He was in the same lane as I was in, but heading the other direction. He saw what had happened, and he wanted everyone to know he had seen it. His head was sticking out of his window like a giraffe stretching for feed through a fence. He was GLARING. Eyes locked in on the driver who set off through the red light.
We’ve all been there. Maybe we were daydreaming, checking emails, or tuning the radio. Our eyes were off the traffic lights, but our peripheral vision caught the vehicle to our left moving, so we moved. Sometimes we catch ourselves and slam on the brakes, other times it’s too late to stop and we simply go on through. It’s dangerous, but rarely intentional.
And it was in that moment that my lesson was revealed to me. How often in life do we make a mistake? Could be intentional. Could be a lack of common sense. Could be completely innocent and unintentional. We have all been there. And also present are those near us, across the way, sticking out their necks, glaring at us down their nose. Condemning. Judging.
I know I’ve been there in traffic and in life. I’ve run a red light in the same fashion. Deep in thought or in worship, maybe checking a text or call, and away I went – even though it wasn’t my time to go. I’ve accidentally cut people off in parking lots and when they lay on their horns, I sheepishly wave and mouth that I am sorry. I’ve also made mistakes in life, and whether innocent or not, I have been at the brutal end of the scrutiny and the glares.
So what’s the lesson I learned? I learned both sides of the coin that day. I learned to not judge hastily. To not let emotions ride high and to not condemn with ease. To assume the best in someone when it’s a situation where innocence could be in play, and to seek to help and not hate. But that’s not all.
I looked at the guy across the intersection and considered him as well. Could he be a hot-head, policing everyone’s moves and motives? Sure. But could he also have lost a family member in an accident caused by someone running a red light? Absolutely. And in that moment I was reminded yet again to give grace. To give the benefit of the doubt. To be slow to judge, but quick to forgive.
Are there times when judgement is warranted, yes. Are there times when discipline is required, of course. But as a general rule, in our normal day to day, let’s not allow the mistakes of others to fuel condemnation and formulate negative opinions. We have all made mistakes, and we will all make mistakes. If everyone is glaring and no one is caring, how is anyone ever helped? How is anyone ever encouraged?
May we all strive to love and lift up others even more in 2019! Have compassion. Make a difference. Happy New Year!
How about you? Have you ever been on either side of the coin? I would love to hear about it. Please feel free to comment.
HOUSE OF PRAIN 
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